This Sunday it starts, and I know you know what I’m talking about.

Hollywood award season.

That gigantic colossal fake-o-rama from The Golden Globes to The Oscars that I just can seem to live without.  The dresses! The speeches!  The constant gossip!

One of the few girly-girl things I set my clock to are these ridiculous awards shows.  I hang time on them.  I leave Dostoyevsky and Proust and Melville on the shelf and scoot all the way to my living room for some badass TV.  It’s like a drug, it is.  This Sunday brings The Golden Globes — with Ricky Gervais as host — and believe you me I’ll have my spot on the couch nested out way early for every strut down the red carpet, the cerebral interviews with Joan Rivers, and no way in hell will I be in bed until the last award is handed out.  My husband (he knows me so well) will have cut the ballot out of the newspaper and, by noon, I’ll have made my picks.  In ink.

And speaking of awards, last week our Sherry bestowed upon me the this lovely plaque: The Versatile Blogger Award.  It requires I reveal 7 unknown things about myself, but all I can think about are the words in green.  How versatile am I, exactly?  This question has been chawing at me, no end, and sadly I’ve discovered I’m nothing if not not versatile.

So 7 things?  I don’t know.  But here’s one: I’m addicted to awards.  I never, never miss them.  I’ll be waiting for that perfect starlet to show up in the killer dress of the night, so I can wonder just what size of Zero that she is, who made the dress, how much it might cost, how many weeks she’s starved herself to fit into it, and how not-comfortable it might be when she’s sitting down or scurrying up (if she’s lucky!) to grab her big award.

In case you’re wondering, here are a few of my picks:

Best Motion Picture Drama:  The Descendants

Best Screenplay:  The Descendants

Best Actor in a Drama:  George Clooney  (for The Descendants)

Funny, I’m about to read THE DESCENDANTS.

See how versatile I am.

Will you be watching on Sunday?

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