Creation

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While the masses were wrestling each over sales racks at the mall, our family spent Black Friday in a quieter kind of 70,000 sq ft space.  One with electronic dinosaurs, replicas of Noah’s Ark, photos of Hitler, and real live snakes.

IMG_20121121_143300It costs 4 adults $120 to walk through Cincinnati’s Creation Museum exhibits and gardens.  You can pay an extra $30 each for a zip-line adventure.  $5 for a camel ride.  $3.50 each for a “Snakes Alive!” workshop.  While there were a few single folks wandering through, taking pictures and videos with their iPads, we were mostly surrounded by large families with dads trying to explain the exhibits of Adam and Eve alongside robotic dinosaurs to their wide-eyed children.  And maybe it’s just my female filter, but I saw mostly scene after scene of Eve initiating all of the world’s problems.

Image 1Like all museums, you have to pass through a large, colorful gift shop and bookstore before you can make your way to the closest exit.  One of the last displays you’ll see before the exit sign is a large glass case with The Origin of Species resting under bright lights alongside a copy of Mein Kampf.  

We were all noticeably disturbed and didn’t have much to say — our normally loud and opinionated crew — on the long walk back to the parking lot.  The writer in me knows there’s an essay in here somewhere, but for now I’m left with trying to connect the dots and discern the purpose of these 70,000 sq ft, at $30 per person.

Though I did see my first sad Zonkey, so there was that.

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17 thoughts on “Creation

  1. Josey

    oh dear lord–you went to the creation museum??? god bless your soul (literally). i’ve not been, but their billboards along 64 as you head toward downtown Louisville always make me smile in a you gotta-be-freakin-kidding me way.

    i don’t have a zonkey story, but I do have a zookey story that reminds me of this zonkey (i may have already told it before, so if so, all apologies):

    while touring our local zoo, we came across the zebras…some were obvious black and white striped zebras (as i always imagined they would be on the cover of averil’s Zebra Crossing–how’s that for a total name drop!?). Anyhoo, along in the back were a group of zebras hanging out who were a less white and black and more…dusty, like maybe they had been rolling around in the dirt. On the fence was a sign promoting “Zookeys” and I said to my husband, “I guess those back there are the Zookeys?”

    he started laughing to the point he had to wipe tears from his eyes. The sign was promoting the zoo’s walking tour audio which they had named “Zookeys” as in Keys to the Zoo. Now when we see any four legged large animal, my husband asks, “You think those are zookeys? I didn’t know they bred them around here.”

    Happy Thanksgiving!!!

    1. Teri Post author

      I can’t figure out who this appeals to. If you were a Christian, I’d think the carnival atmosphere (among other issues) would be offensive. And how you begin with “the world was created in 7 days with dinosaurs” and end with “this is all connected to Darwin and Nazism” was more than a stretch.

      1. Josey

        Anyone who is “into” that place isn’t big on intellect or logical connections. Evolution = Darwin = Evil = Hitler. It’s simple logic. Simple, in that it is constructed for simple people.

  2. lisahgolden

    Crikey.

    I drove by the museum (why am I tempted to put the word museum in quotes?) last night on my way back from Georgia. There’s a dinosaur of green Christmas lights facing I275 that caught my eye. Now I’m curious to see what you might write about it in the future.

    1. Teri Post author

      Well, it wasn’t the British Museum (where my son and I were a month ago), that’s for sure. And I felt sorry for the animals, especially the camel, though I always feel bad for animals in the zoo, so that’s not new.

      We were all far more troubled by the whole experience than we expected.

  3. catherine

    I don’t get the Mein Kamf appearance? Zonkey??
    I LOVE The British Museum and try to pop in every time I go to London. (great cake shop nearby). Also love the The Natural History Museum. Both are free so it’s a privilege to wander and learn. I still go nuts over the dinosaurs. There was a great photography exhibition there this summer by Salgado called Genesis – about man in his habitat – and how we have gone such a long way to destroy this! Beautiful work.

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